am i allowed 2 therapists?
So I know that there’s a message out there that says you cannot do more than one therapy in any one go… but i don’t think this is true.
It’s more nuanced than a dichotomous answer of yes or no.
As a therapist, I would love love love if you could tell me when we meet that you have or are thinking about having a general therapist too. Given my repertoire is sex and relationships and that all over my website I make it pretty obvious that I am not a general therapist, I rarely say it’s a bad idea (which by the way, it’s your choice not mine). The reasons why it’s great if you tell me are:
You trust me enough to tell me (absolutely no judgement here!)
You’re following your gut of what’s right for you (yay you!)
We start off with complete transparency, that can only help our rapport
I can then tailor our therapy together even more, so that you’re not repeating yourself & feel yourself “splitting” between the two
I know that if you’re struggling in an area I’m not specialised in, you have somewhere to go that serves you
We can manage your time & make sure you’re not having 2 therapies in one day, which is usually overwhelming for most
So I would think over a little more of why you think you shouldn’t disclose this kind of information to me and maybe think about if you want to withhold this, what does that say about you and I?
I do want to highlight again though that having more than one therapy can be great! Here’s 2 more examples why:
You’re with me in relationship therapy, which means that you, me and your partner(s) focus on is your relationship together. Of course, we can discuss individual issues here and there too, equity and all, but maybe one of you (or both) are having individual issues that have nothing to do with the relationship, but still need support. There doesn’t need to be a battle of who is the most important, as i completely understand that you can hold yourself and your partner in equal importance - you can focus on both, if you have the capacity & means.
You’re seeing me for sex therapy and your goals and topics are very focussed to this, but you also want to talk about your depression, your eating disorder, or your neurodivergence in depth, more than i can offer. In times like these, I would ask what is most important to you right now, and often it isn’t sex, but actually when both are super important & you have the resources and capacity to do both, who am i to stop you!
Having said this, I also want to be ethical and make sure that you know that having more than one therapy (especially a week) can be: tiring, financially difficult, confusing etc. Therefore it is also my job to check in with you and make sure that 2 therapies aren’t doing more of a disservice, than aid. This can be an ongoing process, instead of a complete write off.
See! Nuance!
If you have more questions on this, please do not hesitate to email or consult with me and ask. I promise i wont bite!
