qualifications

 

MA in Contemporary Relationship Studies - Relationship & Family Therapy

PgDip in Clinical Sexology - Psychosexual & Relationship Therapy

Level 4 Foundation Certificate in Counselling & Psychotherapy

ACET Accredited Sex Educator

Cruse Bereavement Volunteer

Bima holding the camera with two hands, smiling towards it

who am i?

I am a queer, gnc, trans non binary, passionate, rainbow loving qualified Psychosexual and Relationship therapist; Family therapist; certified Sex Educator and a Masters graduate (Distinction) in Relationship Studies. My pronouns are they/them. I hold the necessary insurance to practice and follow the ethical guidelines of COSRT. I have had specific training for delivering online & telephone sessions. I take my continuous professional development seriously; I attend seminars and conferences regularly to keep my knowledge and practice updated.

As well as my relevant qualifications, of which I would highly recommend the Contemporary Institute of Clinical Sexology (CICS) for inspiring sex & relationship therapists, I also have a First Class BA degree in Italian. Whether it with languages or sex & relationships, I know & empathise with the complexity of languages and how difficult it can be to communicate with, understand, and be heard by others, especially when the majority of us were not taught how! Sex is sadly taboo, but I hope that with my sex positivity and my openness to diversity I will create a comfortable environment for you to tell me how you’re feeling and what you’re struggling with.

Neuroscience and how our brains work also fascinate me; it can tell us a lot about why we react and act in certain ways, simply because of our biology and how we are wired. I also love to focus on the raw emotions we have too that go beyond biology. It feels only right to be holistic in the way we analyse ourselves and if we can fully see and understand our whole selves, then we can do a much better job at helping and accepting our whole selves.

I have diagnosed ADHD and self and peer diagnosed ASD. Although I have lived experience of neurodivergence of myself and clients, I am not a neurodivergent specialist. As it is becoming clear, queerness and neurodivergence are sometimes connected. I do work with neurodivergent folk in therapy as I aim to be accessible to all, however, if this were to be the main focus on therapy I would not take you on, as I am mainly psychosexually and relationally trained. The same goes with people with severe depression or anxiety; working with low mental health is something I do daily, but there is a line I do not cross in terms of my trained experience and knowledge. If your mental health is feeling more prevalent than sex or relationships, I may suggest an alternative therapist for you.

Let’s work together!

As well as therapy, I am available to be booked for talks, consulting, panels, workshops, collaborations, you name it! All things sex and relationships. Email me to enquire.

Where I’ve been:

Featured in: Elle, HuffPost ⓵ ⓶, COSMO ⓵ ⓶ ⓷ ⓸, Stylist, GayTimes

MTV’s documentary : Amy Winehouse & Me - speaking with Dionne Bromfield & others about bereavement as a spokesperson for Cruse

My Coral : Talk Dirty To Me - online event with Zoe Kors, talking about sex and intimacy

Hanx & Leith : Let’s Open Up - in person panel talking about Vaginismus with Dr Sarah Welsh, Fran Bushe & Mari Wilson

Podcasts : Come Curious, Cliterally The Best, S3x Theory With Dee, WWR, Culturally Curious, Eyestorm Women’s Voices, Untold Pleasure: Cancer, Sex & Intimacy

my approach.

I work in a Integrative & Humanistic way, which means my approach within sex & relationship therapy is tailored to you. I assess your needs and work in a way that will help you best.

The styles of therapy that I integrate in my work have been learned either in my Diploma, MA or via continuing professional development.

 

Approaches I use:

  • Psychosexual Therapy

  • Gestalt Therapy

  • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

  • Human Givens Therapy

  • Somatic (no touch)

  • Couples Counselling

  • Mindfulness

  • Transactional Analysis

  • Solutions Focused Therapy

  • Systemic - Family Therapy

  • Rewind Trauma Therapy

  • Safe Space for Trans Folk

  • Safe Space for Sex Workers

  • Kink & fetish Aware

  • Registered Member of COSRT

sex education

Instagram - @loxleysexology

If you follow me or see me on Instagram, you are more than welcome to bring this up in session and how you feel about what information I put out into the world. I am human, I am a sex educator and I am an activist; my queer identity is political, but ultimately I am a therapist and I am always open to learning about your opinions and needs and how we can navigate the therapeutic space together.

Please see below for anatomy drawings i have made

View fullsize It makes sense that solo sex can be more pleasurable... but have you looked into why? Have you tried making partnered sex better? Is that even possible for you? Have you looked at the pressure in the room, the lack of toys or (the lack of) communicat
View fullsize If this lands with you, I see you! I blame the patriarchy and lack of sex ed, where we may have thought using sex to connect or fill a void was the best way. And sometimes it is, but personally with hindsight, I wish I didn't use sex so much as a mod
View fullsize Sure, you can be cis and use they/them pronouns or you can be enby and use your assigned pronouns... who makes the rules?! Noone... #enby #pronouns #pronounsmatter #nonbinary #theythem
View fullsize Shame on the UK. #pubertyblockers #pubertyblockers #translivesmatter #transkidsdeservetogrowup #transkidsdeservebetter
View fullsize The word coercive is a little much, but the term is catchy! Unwanted or unwelcome queering, or simply queering someone, isn't always wanted eh, and thats ok. #queering #queerup #queer
View fullsize Do you have a super simple, easy way to climax that works almost every time? Do you then find it difficult to O in other ways, or feel that "good sex" = orgasm? Well maybe it's time to explore yourself more! Slow down. Get curious. Take org
View fullsize It's quite common to conflate sex with success, but why? Why does one act have to define us? What would happen if we disentangled this narrative, which clearly comes from the mononormative, patriarchal structure we live in and decide how we get to li
View fullsize
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View fullsize The tricky dilemma (especially for those socialised as girls/women) where we viscerally hate being sexualised and objectified (by men usually), yet actually really desire and need it, particularly in our long term relationships. Obviously not everyo
View fullsize Today marks 4 years since my little sister died in a car incident ♡ Grief presents itself differently to everyone, so there are no rules on how to grieve...be it a loved one, a pet and future lost. We cannot compare grief, that's not fair and would b
View fullsize Not all disabilities are visible and all disabilities are valid. I am a disabled person and yes, even i sometimes question if I'm disabled enough...that's ableism honey! In London? You know you can get a free TFL badge that asks people to offer you
View fullsize First off, you are trans enough. I don't even need to know you, I just know you are! 🏳️‍⚧️ Secondly, being trans (not cis) doesn't need to involve pain. Your validity isn't based on how much trauma and suffering you've had, trans people don't ow
View fullsize Obviously, arguing parents aren't a monolith and neither are their kids...but kids are smart & usually can sense a lot more than you think - it's not even about arguing, it's energy. Leave because you need to leave, not because you think your kid
View fullsize
View fullsize You're not too much. You are enough! Emotionally, sexuality, romantically, in your queerness, your disability, in your expression of self. You are a wonderful human and noone has a right to judge. #youareenough #youarenottoomuch #iamenough #iamnottoo
View fullsize Reasons why you might want to: Give yourself compassion. Affirm your desires. Validate your trauma. Hope for your sexual future. Explore new ideas. Say hello to this part of you. Get to know yourself. Accustom yourself to this part. Why not! #lettert
View fullsize For a lot of us, being unable to be fully open and vulnerable during sex is really difficult, probably due to some form of internal shame, or it could also be trauma or many other reasons. But if you're struggling with shame, I can bet that you weren
View fullsize The idea that as soon as you have a lover/a partner, your solo play stops, to me seems absurd! It's like saying you had a favourite hobby or restaurant or film that stops as soon as someone else offers you something different? They're not the same, s
View fullsize Just a bit of fun! I wanna know yours, so get adventurous and find your words! You can also change the theme to sexuality or gender! #acronym #dirtywords #dirtyword #playful
homologous clitoris & penis

homologous clitoris & penis

anatomy of a vulva

anatomy of a vulva

anatomy of a penis

anatomy of a penis

anatomy of a vagina

anatomy of a vagina